Lesson from 'Spoon Boy'

Spoon boy: Do not try and bend the spoon. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth.
Neo: What truth?
Spoon boy: There is no spoon.
Neo: There is no spoon?
Spoon boy: Then you'll see, that it is not the spoon that bends, it is only yourself. 

Some of you have asked me how do I do what I do. How do I balance my demanding job (which spills over into my personal life all the time), civic/social responsibilities, family commitments and maintain a healthy relationship with Boris? I know many of you are balancing a full plate as well (spouses/partners, children, teaching responsibilities, friendships, second jobs, older parents who need your attention and care, etc).

So how do we, the women and men who work with "Other People's Children," keep everything in perspective while being everything to everyone?

I like to think of it as a Lesson from 'Spoon Boy."

Now let's look at this famous line from the Matrix with the the thought of balancing our "plate" of responsibilities...

Spoon boy: Do not try and balance the plate. That's impossible. Instead... only try to realize the truth.
Educator: What truth?
Spoon boy: There is no plate.
Educator: There is no plate?
Spoon boy: Then you'll see, that it is not the plate that balances, it is only yourself. 

Looking at our lives this way takes the focus off all of our STUFF and puts it on ourselves. The truth is we owe it to ourselves to take care of ourselves (mentally, emotionally,spiritually, etc) so we'll have more of ourselves to give to others.

As you all know by now I'm a fan of great thinkers, particularly those who write on topics that transcend our thoughts beyond the ordinary way of looking at life.  Below are some quotes from the Dalai Lama, a Tibetan leader known for his writings on love, compassion, peace, humanity and the environment.

May his writings bring you into balance with yourself.

1- Happiness is not something ready-made. It comes from your own actions.

2- If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.

3- If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

4- My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.

5- Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

6- The ultimate authority must always rest with the individual’s own reason and critical analysis.

7- We can live without religion and meditation, but we cannot survive without human affection.

8- We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.

9- Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.

10- If you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry.

11- If you don’t love yourself, you cannot love others. You will not be able to love others. If you have no compassion for yourself then you are not able of developing compassion for others.

12- Human potential is the same for all. Your feeling, “I am of no value”, is wrong. Absolutely wrong. You are deceiving yourself. We all have the power of thought – so what are you lacking? If you have willpower, then you can change anything. It is usually said that you are your own master.

13- We must recognize that the suffering of one person or one nation is the suffering of humanity. That the happiness of one person or nation is the happiness of humanity.

14- Through violence, you may ‘solve’ one problem, but you sow the seeds for another.

15- As people alive today, we must consider future generations: a clean environment is a human right like any other. It is therefore part of our responsibility toward others to ensure that the world we pass on is as healthy, if not healthier, than we found it.

16- To conquer oneself is a greater victory than to conquer thousands in a battle.

17- There is a saying in Tibetan, “Tragedy should be utilized as a source of strength.”
No matter what sort of difficulties, how painful experience is, if we lose our hope, that’s our real disaster.

18- The creatures that inhabit this earth-be they human beings or animals-are here to contribute, each in its own particular way, to the beauty and prosperity of the world.

19- A spoon cannot taste of the food it carries. Likewise, a foolish man cannot understand the wise man´s wisdom even if he associates with a sage.

20- In our struggle for freedom, truth is the only weapon we possess.